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Chapter 265: The Knot In His Heart

Little Bei started eating, but Shao Nan didn’t move his chopsticks. Instead, he kept staring at the noodles.

“What’s wrong, Little Nan?” Mu Jingzhe quickly asked.

“Nothing. I just want to remember it.” Shao Nan smiled and imprinted it in his mind forever. He would be happy whenever he recalled this in the future.

“Remember not to break the noodle. You have to eat it in one go. That way, you’ll be safe and live a long life.”

After eating it last year, Shao Nan and Little Bei completed their mission perfectly. “Done.”

“Good job. You kids should hurry up and eat too.”

Mu Jingzhe urged Shao Dong and the rest to start eating. Only then did they start eating. They looked as if they hadn’t eaten for a few days.

Mu Jingzhe looked at Shao Qihai suspiciously. “They didn’t eat today?” How had he taken care of the children?

“They did,” Shao Qihai quickly answered. “I remembered everything. I didn’t let them starve. It’s just that they’ve been a tad tired these days and only regained their appetite when they got back.”

Mu Jingzhe had made the noodles according to her habits, which meant that she had prepared a share for herself and Xiao Wu as well. She and Xiao Wu had only just eaten, so they didn’t eat again. However, the entire pot of noodles was still finished in the end.

“Delicious. Mommy’s noodles are the best.”

“Yeah, I feel alive now.”

After eating their fill, they praised Mu Jingzhe again. Shao Qihai washed the dishes in satisfaction.

Afraid that they would fall asleep after eating too much, Mu Jingzhe pulled them to take a walk in the courtyard so they could digest their food. It happened to be a full moon, and the moonlight was very bright. They didn’t even need to use a torchlight.

Every single one of them either looked up at the moon or the stars. “Sister Chang’e[1] and the little rabbit must be asleep.”

After talking about the moon for a while, they started identifying the constellations in the sky. Little Bei suddenly said, “I wonder if our mother turned into that star. Is she watching us from the sky?”

This was what Mu Jingzhe had said to comfort them before—that when a person died, they would turn into a star in the sky.

“It’s the one that’s blinking at you.” Mu Jingzhe picked Little Bei up.

After searching for blinking stars for a while, it was almost time to rest. Xiao Wu insisted on sleeping with Mu Jingzhe, so she brought Xiao Wu and Little Bei with her.

Even though she was so tired that she couldn’t even open her eyes, Little Bei hugged Mu Jingzhe and said that she’d missed her.

Xiao Wu wasn’t asleep yet. He looked at Little Bei, who was sleeping, and whispered to Mu Jingzhe, “Mommy, my brothers and sister seem a little sad.”

“Mm, I don’t know why.” Mu Jingzhe could tell. Were they perhaps upset because they missed Bai Lu? Didn’t seem like it, though. In the past, they also used to be sad, but it was a little different today.

Normally, being able to go to Bai Lu’s grave and kowtow should have fulfilled a wish they had always desired to fulfill. However, Shao Dong’s expression wasn’t right either. Mu Jingzhe guessed that it might be related to their maternal grandparents.

Mu Jingzhe had roughly guessed the truth. Shao Dong and Shao Xi still remembered Bai Lu and had some impression of her, but Shao Nan and Little Bei didn’t have any memories of her.

This trip to pay their respects to their mother had a different meaning to them. They had gone with high hopes, but when they’d arrived, they had realized that everything was different from what they had imagined.

The Bai Family had been very cold to Shao Qihai and even to their grandchildren. Compared to Li Zhaodi and the rest, the difference was drastic. They treated Shao Dong and the boys better and basically ignored Little Bei.

When they’d arrived at Bai Lu’s grave, they had realized that it was a mess. Wild grass grew everywhere, and no one had cleaned it up. Not feeling very surprised, Shao Qihai had simply squatted down and skillfully cleaned up the mess.

During lunch, Shao Dong and the boys were used to taking care of their younger sister, Little Bei. This had made Grandpa Bai unhappy, and he’d grumbled about them making a fuss over a little girl. Grandma hadn’t dared say a word. He’d only shut up after Shao Qihai spoke.

However, when the villagers had come and recognized Little Bei, Grandpa Bai and the rest had found out that Little Bei was a child star, and their attitude had immediately changed. They had gone on about how Bai Lu had died while giving birth to them and hinted that the kids should take Bai Lu’s place and be filial to them, especially Little Bei.

One moment, they’d be talking about who had leather shoes next door and who had a gold bracelet. The next moment, they’d be talking about wanting a television. Later, they’d started talking about not feeling well and wanting to go to the hospital to see a doctor. They’d either hint at the kids to buy them something or give them money.

The four children hadn’t expected this trip to turn out like this. It would be a lie to say that they weren’t disappointed. This was also the reason they had come back so quickly.

It was Bai Lu’s death anniversary, but they didn’t seem to have made any preparations. Shao Qihai and the others had paid for the offerings themselves, and those people had even kept finding excuses to ask for money, so they had come back after paying their respects.

The atmosphere had been depressing at the Bai Residence. The children only came to life when they saw Mu Jingzhe again. This was also why they were so noisy.

On the way, Shao Dong had asked why Bai Lu was still buried there since Grandpa Bai and the others didn’t think highly of her. Shao Qihai had only said something about returning to one’s roots.

In reality, it wasn’t that simple. Back then, when he had come back from a mission, Bai Lu had already been gone. The Bai Family’s parents had made a fuss and hadn’t given him any peace. They’d kept ranting about how difficult it had been for them to raise Bai Lu and how much money they had spent. He’d even almost retired from the army because of this.

Later on, they’d finally calmed down after he had compensated them with a large sum of money. However, they’d insisted on getting back the corpse and burying her in their village. Still, they had pretty much disregarded it and merely used that as an excuse to receive a sum of benefits from Shao Qihai every year.

Each year, when there was time, Shao Qihai would go back to pay his respects. Every time he went, he had to give them some money. Otherwise, he wouldn’t even be able to go to the grave.

Shao Qihai had never told Shao Dong and his siblings these things, nor had he ever badmouthed Grandpa Bai and the rest. The kids had also been really young at the time of Bai Lu’s death, so they hadn’t seen their maternal grandparents much. Only when they had gone this time and heard about Bai Lu’s past had they learned what kind of people Grandpa Bai’s family were.

They weren’t exactly super-villains, but they’d always had some small flaws. The common problem of favoring boys over girls was undoubtedly reflected in them, so Bai Lu hadn’t been living well from a young age.

Shao Dong felt quite upset. Perhaps it was because he was feeling uncomfortable, but after he finally fell asleep, he dreamed again. Just like on Bai Lu’s death anniversary in the past, he dreamed of Bai Lu crying and begging for mercy.

Shao Dong suddenly sat up from crying, his forehead covered in sweat. He suddenly felt that something was amiss and turned around to see Shao Xi sitting there too.

“Big Brother, did you dream of it too?”

Shao Dong acknowledged this, and Shao Xi sighed in the dark. “Mommy, she… is so pitiful. Brother, do you think every time she appears in our dreams it’s because she feels indignant?”

Shao Dong didn’t say anything. He had always felt that Bai Lu had died because of Zhao Lan. However, he was afraid that he was too young, so his memory could be wrong. Thus, Shao Dong thought that perhaps he would feel much better after going there and kowtowing.

However, he’d only found out after going there that it was useless. In fact, he felt even more uncomfortable and awful.

“We can’t be sure if Zhao Lan indirectly caused Mommy’s death. Don’t say these words again in case Little Nan and the rest hear you.”

“Big Brother, I’ve already heard it.” Shao Nan, whom the duo had glanced at earlier to confirm that he was asleep, suddenly sat up and spoke.

“You scared me to death.” Shao Xi was shocked. “Why didn’t you say anything when you woke up…”

“If I had said anything, I wouldn’t have heard this. Big Brother, what exactly happened?”

[1] The Chinese goddess of the Moon