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Sure, Malika had found out that Russel was from Greyson, but that still hadn\'t narrowed it down. And with Hawi\'s endless questions about the security of her mate in the hands of the Greyson warriors, there was much to be discussed.

So Hawi went down to the riverside. It was the only place she knew of, where she could sit and clear her mind. So many things were worrying her and Rukia Greyson certainly topped that list.

"Hawi," Malika reached out to her white wolf in the mind-link. She had felt Hawi\'s mood change suddenly, but she figured it was probably just her being with the warriors since it was already evening.

"Malika," Hawi finally responded blindly, like she didn\'t even want to know what Malika had to say, when in reality, she was glad she could hear Malika\'s voice.

There was a comfort that only Malika could give her. It was the kind that not even Rukiya, her mate would. Anyone would think of it as a motherly bond, given how Hawi had bonded with Malika, but she wasn\'t going to think of it like that, because the woman was her guardian.

"I am in your suite," Malika said excitedly. It had taken a lot of hard work for her to get there and she was happy to show her mistress that she had gotten what they needed.

The entry to the suite was important because there were some things that Hawi needed from there. They were important and now that Malika was in there it was time for Hawi to say what it was that she wanted, and Malika would just give it to her.

"Did you know it was Razia Greyson?" Hawi asked after a long silence. She had been contemplating a lot tonight and the more she thought the more she wanted blood.

The realization that Razia was after her daughter was not sitting well with Hawi and she hated it. However, a mother betraying their child was not in Hawi\'s bingo cards. This was insane and it hurt for some reason.

"Fuck," Malika responded as she portaled to where Hawi was. This time she didn\'t need to hide because there was no point.

If anything, she had reinforced Hawi\'s suite with magic, they wouldn\'t allow anyone to get in, not even Razia Greyson herself. She would go back there later, when she was certain that her mistress was alright.

"Hawi—" Malika greeted as she pulled the Alpha into a hug. She could see that Hawi needed it and Hawi didn\'t fight it this time. She really did need comfort. Her protector knew how to read her well.

"What happened?" Malka asked and Hawi indulged her in everything.

She didn\'t hold back and each time, there was a rumble in the sky, a reminder that they needed to go out there and force the answer out of Razia, but then what use would that be at the moment?

"I thought I was the one who wasn\'t in control," Hawi smirked and Malika just hugged her again, before they sat on the stores at the river bank. The winds were warm, strangely for a night that had been filled with disaster.

"Well, tomato, tomato," Malika teased making Hawi laugh a little.

"So, what did you find in my suite?" Hawi asked as she looked in the distance like she wasn\'t ready to talk about what had just happened.

She didn\'t understand her powers and her anger but she wasn\'t going to remind herself of the mess she had become in one night, perhaps there was a better way out of this, or there would be an easier way out.

But would Malika let Hawi have that when she was running away from reality once again?

"We can talk about the suite later. You need to talk to me. You have so much pent-up anger and there is no better opponent than me. So come on Mistress, share your pain, won\'t you?" Malika said as she dragged Hawi so she stood up.

She then conjured their weapons so that each of them and their usual weapons. It wasn\'t hard for them even as they began to spar. Their spars were dangerous, almost like real fights. Well, they were real fights, save for the actual desire to want to kill the other.

That was how they trained themselves.

"Will you tell her?" Malika asked as she swung her sword at Hawi who instantly missed.

"I can\'t. I haven\'t even gotten her to accept being my mate. How the fuck should I start telling her that her mother is the one who wants her dead because of me?" Hawi asked as she used her baton to strike at Malika, who also missed, but swung her sword, almost hitting Hawi.

It was a brutal spar, and if anyone was watching them, then they wouldn\'t even dare to talk this time.

"She loves you, Hawi. It is very obvious. I know you want to argue that she is doing this because of the blood oath, but what if there is really more to it? What if you are it for her? What then? Will you run away from her?" Malika asked and Hawi sighed as they kept on sparring.

She had thought of this so many times. She had imagined a world in which Rukiya Greyson loved her for who she was and not for who she was meant to be. It was a wild assumption, but then it wasn\'t like Hawi had anyone to tell her what love was and what it was not.

Her entire family was murdered and all of them made her feel like they betrayed her. It wasn\'t an easy thing for her and Malika understood that.

"I don\'t want to have hope, Malika. I don\'t want to hope that she is in love with me, only for her to realize she was just loyal and thought she was in love with me because of the oath. I love her, I know that, and that is enough for me.

"I don\'t mind if she didn\'t feel the same, but I can\'t keep hoping for more. I can\'t hope for more really, because what if my fears are true and she only likes me, or she thinks she likes me because of that oath?

"I can\'t ruin her life like that or even ruin her for her mate. I may be selfish in my love for her, but even I am selfish enough to know that she might not really be mine," Hawi said.

Malika just stared at her, their spars were getting harsher, but in that moment, Malika stopped to really try and understand what was in Hawi\'s brain.

This woman was difficult to understand and it wasn\'t new for her, but here with her, Malika wondered if there were more loose screws in Hawi\'s head since the last time they had interacted.

"Tell me something, Mistress, are you sure you don\'t want Hudhayfah looking into your brain? I think you might have extra loose crews there. Everyone sees how much Rukiya loves you and YOU are the only one that doesn\'t?

"Make it make sense, woman," Malika signed exaggeratedly. but even then she was right.