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Chapter 368: Dragged Down

LERRIN

Holding Suhle was almost as wonderful as kissing her.

Almost.

Her hood was back and she was warm and soft in his arms, her cheek resting on his chest, her breath fluttering her hair. He held her, but loosely, trembling with the restraint it took not to explore her with his hands, but she trembled too, and not for the reasons he would wish.

Her scent was a complex mix—relief when she pressed into his chest, grief, and fear foremost. But a new kind of fear. It had a quality he hadn\'t sensed in her before.

What is it, Suhle? he sent. There\'s something more.

She sighed. I fear where this will take us. I fear what might become of me. I fear what will become of you. Lerrin, Reth is not an easy foe. There is a reason he has had no challengers. He… it would be so much better to meet him at the table—

He almost pushed her away. But he knew one wrong move and she would retreat forever. But he tensed and she felt it and her sending stopped.

"That male… he says he wants peace, but then he tortures and kills simple soldiers? Paryk isn\'t even a fighter! He told me he wanted peace, but he does not."

Her breath shuddered as she sucked in, then she pulled her head up and her eyes shone with tears. For him? "He told you he wanted peace?" she asked faintly.

Lerrin nodded, and sent her the memory…

…Below Lerrin\'s position on a wide boulder overstanding the river, Reth stood in the water, the donkey behind him. The water rippling around their legs.

The false King\'s eyes widened. "You stood for Elia?" he asked, genuinely shocked.

Lerrin sneered. The memory twisted in his gut. "When she gave her story, yes. I saw the vision of what you hoped to achieve. I am ashamed to say I urged my father to caution in moving against you. I can see now what a betrayal that was to my people."

"No, Lerrin, that means we can find our way through this. You and I, together—" Reth took a step forward, but was stopped by Behryn grabbing the back of his shirt.

Lerrin dropped his chin and let every ounce of hatred he felt for this man shine in his eyes. "The only way I see through this is over your grave, cat," he snarled.

"I know you\'re angry," Reth said in that patient tone that, to Lerrin, felt like fur rubbed the wrong direction. "But when this shock passes, remember, I never take the first strike. You know that. You\'ve seen that in me your whole life."

"I don\'t give a shit who started the fight. You ended it, Reth. When you took my sister, you took the last of my pack. I will hunt you to any corner of the Creator\'s land, but I will take you—"

"For the Creator\'s sake, don\'t do it, Lerrin!" Reth cried, his hands up, palms towards Lerrin. "Don\'t align yourself and your word with something you\'ll regret. You can still hunt me. But don\'t paint yourself into a corner by vowing it. Listen!"

"I am FINISHED listening to you!"

"Even your father knew that listening to your enemies was never a futile effort, Lerrin," Reth growled. "Now, listen: Your wolves are on edge, erratic and violent. As angry as they are, their aggression will be coming out whether it\'s directed at me or not. And with Lucine\'s example taking Elia… Don\'t forget that if they\'ll do it with you, they\'ll do it to you."

"I can\'t decide if you\'re foolish enough to believe you actually understand my people better than I do, or stupid enough to think you could intimidate me with them." Lerrin leaned forward, eyes locked with Reth in the primal challenge of predator to predator, yearning to bite out the cat\'s throat. "The difference is, they love me. They serve me by choice."

Reth sagged, shaking his head. "You have held the Alpha power for what, hours? Trust me, Lerrin, you will learn the value of a measured consideration. You showed that you have it when we discussed the attacks on Elia. I know… I know this has been a difficult time, but please hear me: Should you ever discover you have reason to question this conflict, or your people are… reaching for things you do not wish to take, get word to me. I will listen. We could end this together. Without bloodshed."

"ENOUGH!" Lerrin shook with pure fury. "ENOUGH! Shut your fucking mouth, Reth. You betrayed your people—all of us! But especially my sister and my tribe. We will not let a traitor stand on the throne. You broke Lucine, then buried her. And I vow you will pay!"

For a moment he was poised there, on the edge of the rock at the edge of the water, teetering, about to leap and take his chances—his beast snarling to come forward and take them. But then something flashed.

Before Lerrin could find the source, Reth, half-crouched in the water, screamed "NO!" and threw up an arm, blocking Behryn as he moved.

Lerrin hesitated as Behryn bellowed in frustration and the metallic flash of whatever weapon he\'d thrown dropped impotently into the water twenty feet away.

Lerrin, shocked out of his anger looked first at the rippling water, then snapped his head to find Reth, who had one arm gripped on Behryn\'s wrist and the two were glaring at each other—almost on the edge of violence between them.

Had the cat just saved his life?

Was that possible?

What an utter, utter fool.

Lerrin, his mouth still open, shook his head. "Weak," he said. "That was your chance and you defeated it yourself?"

"I do not make the first strike, Lerrin." Reth\'s eyes burned with conviction that only seared Lerrin\'s hate. The self-righteous prick. "I told you. If you ever wish to speak with me, send a message. I will listen…."

…Lerrin blinked back to the present. Suhle was blinking too, and her scent a confusing mix of so many emotions he couldn\'t pick them out.

"He said all that, Suhle, then see what he did."

She turned away from him, stepped out of his arms and Lerrin took it like a punch to the gut. "Please, don\'t—"

"You\'re right, of course you\'re right…. He was wrong to kill the prisoners," she said, her voice barely above a whisper. "I will weep for them. But… but Lerrin… he saved your life. His convictions… they were real. He showed you they were real. He has done things he should not do, but don\'t we all? Can you not see: Peace is possible."

Lerrin\'s heart began to pound as he saw the memory not through the filter of his own hate and anger, his grief. But through Suhle\'s eyes. Saw it how she must see it. For a moment the world shifted—he could get a message to Reth. He could offer a negotiation. They could share territory or power. Reth could help him clean the rot from among this people—and he could help Reth see the ways the Anima needed to change. He could—

Memories flashed like the wings of a pheasant bursting from under foot.

His father, skin gray and throat open.

His sister, a blade inserted in the back of her skull.

His loyal people—thrown from their homes and livelihoods despite having nothing to do with his father\'s plots…

A wave of rage and hate shattered the warmth he\'d been feeling. Lerrin\'s jaw clenched and he let his eyes go flat. "The Cat sees himself as better than he is. And I will show him he is not," he said, his voice low and dark.

Suhle sighed and swallowed.

Lerrin sucked in a breath. "Suhle, please, believe me. I am coming back. And I will keep you safe." He reached for her, slowly, so he wouldn\'t frighten her.

She didn\'t frighten. But her eyes followed his hands as they came closer, then she shook her head and stepped back, then back again.

"No, Lerrin," she whispered. "By your own memories, I cannot be a part of this. I cannot choose war where peace would be possible. I am sorry. I will pray for your safe return." Her eyes snapped up to meet his then, wide again, fear bleeding into her scent. "I will pray fervently for your safe return."