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Her body was still sore, but cooped to the last time she could recall her pains, she was feeling a little better. She was currently in a comfy bed, one that she could have sworn she hadn\'t called for or even summoned.

It was a luxurious one, the kind that she had in Sicario, but her bed with Jer was comparably smaller than this one. Sure, it had been a big eight-by-twelve bed, but as Hawi took in her surroundings, she knew she wasn\'t even at the Clarkson pack anymore.

The huge bed covered in white sheets that were stained by her bloodied body stared at her as she watched the endless bed. She could see Rukiya beside her and for a moment, Hawi let out a sigh of relief.

She wasn\'t alone here, and no one was coming for her with spears and guns. She hadn\'t murdered anyone, and she hadn\'t done something that society would frown upon. She looked at her hands and there were no claws retracting, or even blood beneath her nails.

"You\'re awake?" Rukiya asked groggily as she looked at the love of her life who was trying to sit up in bed.

She had been sleeping beside Hawi, close enough to make sure she wasn\'t hurt and got everything she needed, but distant enough to make sure the woman didn\'t wake up and start throwing a fit about how she felt nothing for Rukiya.

Or even how she didn\'t mind walking back to Sicario despite being hurt and wild as hell.

"You know I hate closed doors and rooms," Hawi said as she saw the Mahogany door staring at her.

She couldn\'t help but remember the pain she had felt the last time she had found herself behind closed doors and in the dark. She had a lot of painful memoirs, but then she couldn\'t live like an outcast her whole life.

Granted, Hawi may have been sleeping on the floor in the living room of the pack house at Clarkson, but that didn\'t mean she deserved the hostility she was showing herself. She deserved better, and she knew it too.

However, she just wasn\'t ready to face that reality. Not yet.

"Hawi," Rukiya said softly as she looked at the woman in her bed.

Sure, she hadn\'t expected a bloodied Hawi in her bed, but then she hoped that there would come other days when she wouldn\'t be nursing her love, just because of her inflicted wounds.

"You\'re safe, baby," Rukiya said as she looked at the frustrated Hawi.

Rukiya could see that Hawi was contemplating making a run for it, but then the woman had made a deal with Rukiya to not turn Clarkson into a madhouse and in return, Hawi would let her do whatever she wanted with her.

And in this case, Rukiya had brought her to her home. She had let Hawi in, even though she knew it was not going to be easy having two alphas in one pack, especially when both of them were extremely powerful on their own.

Maybe it was a stretch, but it wasn\'t like Rukiya\'s heart which was solely beating for Hawi could take any hints at how dangerous it was, no?

"You don\'t know that. Fuck. My wolf should have healed me by now. I wonder what\'s taking so long," Hawi added as she tried to push the duvet off of her, but Rukiya wouldn\'t let her.

"No. Not yet. You can\'t get out of this bed unless you want to use the washroom. And yes, I know you\'re safe, because if anyone tries anything, I will kill them first and ask questions later.

"No one will hurt you and no one will take you away from me; not even if I have to fight the moon goddess myself," Rukiya said, the determination in her voice making Hawi smile even though she was still in pain.

It was obvious she had slept for a few hours but damn, she wished she had drunk a sleeping portion or Malika would have cast a spell on her to make her sleep through the injuries, but then it wasn\'t like that was a miracle that could happen anytime now.

"Me being here will put you in danger, Ruru. I\'m a time-ticking bomb, and it\'s not fair to force my baggage on your people. You have innocents in this pack who don\'t know anything about why I was banished or even what could happen if my people find out that I\'m alive.

"I worry that they might try to use them as collateral, and I can\'t choose between my vengeance and a bunch of innocents, Ruru. I\'ve suffered too much to give it up. Which is why it\'s a smart idea to leave me be.

"I know it\'s not what we both want to hear, but danger always follows wherever I go," Hawi said defeatedly as she ran her fingers through her hair frustratedly. She loved the idea of being around Rukiya and staying here, but Hawi was right.

If word was out there that the banished alpha didn\'t die and that she was alive all this while, so many things could go wrong and Malika would be put in impossible situations.

Hawi wanted to protect the woman who was tasked with protecting her, maybe because Malika was the very first one who had been sincere with her.

She couldn\'t let shit go sideways just because she was doing quests as Rukiya\'s guest or whatever the fuck she was here as. She didn\'t want to do this, not if lives would be lost, undeserving lives. It would be too much for her.

"Oh, Hawi," Rukiya began as she stared lovingly at the psycho on her bed.

"I knew all that, long before I started looking for you in the free lands, Hawi. I knew that you were dangerous and death followed you like a shadow, and even then, I didn\'t stop looking for you.

"I don\'t care if the devil himself will come after me for having you this close to me, but I won\'t lose you. And you keep forgetting that now that you\'re no longer the Sicario reigning alpha, your pack has fallen a few steps behind.

"That leaves Greyson as the strongest pack to ever exist. I don\'t care what happens, Hawi, and I know you might think that I\'m saying that because I refuse to lose you, which is true, but I\'m also sure because I have the best army in the realm right now.

"I don\'t want you for power, or whatever it is that is going on through your head right now, Hawi. I want you, for you. I need you, for who you are; the person who makes me smile, and makes me the happiest. I\'m crazy about you and I go crazy at the thought of you being away.

"If loving you brings the devil to my doorstep, then so be it, I will lead my army into battling all the devils, for you," Rukiya said as she carefully closed the distance between her and Hawi.

She was fighting the urge to kiss Hawi\'s plump lips that were staring at her, and only because the woman was still in pain and Rukiya didn\'t want to hurt her in the process. She was a patient alpha. But she wouldn\'t lose her, not again. Never.

"But Ruru—"

"Earlier, you said you\'d let me do what I want with you, no? Then let me nurse you back to health, Hawi. You\'ve always taken care of everyone around you, always worrying about everyone except yourself, so let me, please.

"Let me be the shoulder for you to lean on in your happy times and sad times. Let me join you in fighting your battles, blood oath or not. There will always be obstacles ahead, for you, for me, for us, but I\'m ready for all that, otherwise I wouldn\'t have sent Adolf to seek you out.

"And if I\'m being honest, I didn\'t seek you out because mother dearest wanted to talk to you. I only sought you out, for me, baby. I did it because I was sick of loving you from a distance and wanted you near, consequences be damned.

"I\'m that selfish when it comes to you," Rukiya said earnestly, and Hawi sighed.

"You\'re so stubborn."

"No, Hawi, I just love you, so much it breaks my heart to see you in this state. Please don\'t push me away."